Ready to explode.

Well, Garbo discontinued his blog.
Now I have nothing to live for anymore...

just kidding.

I am depressed though. I really hate people. I mean, why can't they leave him alone? He's just a normal guy that happens to be a bassist in a famous band. Godddd.

That's the end of that rant.

Next on my list..
hmm, let's see.

Oh. Work.

I love my job, don't get me wrong.
I love golf.
I love [most of] the people I work with; they're like a family to me.

What I don't love?
I don't love certain people's attitudes.
Towards me, towards working...just their attitudes in general.

I'm sick of working double shifts for people who decide not to show up.
And then, when they DO show up, they make excuses for their tardiness.

You got stuck in traffic?
How many more times are you going to use that one?

I have some advice for you: Leave earlier.

Really. I don't mind picking up slack once in a while. God knows I need the money.
But at least call.

I'm tired of hearing that I'm too much of a good girl.
Obviously, something is wrong with me.
I mean, I don't drink!?
I don't have sex!?

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?!

...uh. It's a thing called self respect.

Maybe you should try it?
Accept me for who I am.

I don't judge you.
I may not agree with your views, but that doesn't automatically make me wrong.
And it certainly doesn't make you right.
The beauty of this country is that I can believe in whatever I want.

And even in dance, I can't escape it.

For some unknown reason,
my jazz teacher [Brandi] doesn't like me.

I have no idea why.
I haven't done anything to make her hate me.
yet she acts like I killed her puppy or something.

I'm never good enough for her.
I always say the wrong things.

She finds something wrong with the way I do a step
and calls me out.
I used to be embarrassed
but I've learned to shrug it off.
I ignore her.

If she wants to be immature, then I'll let her.

Tonight was the last straw.
Rehearsal was at eight
I got off work at seven.

I rushed home, changed, drove to Severna Park
and forgot my a. tap shoes and b. money to pay for my jazz costume.

She refused to give me the costume until I paid her.

It's not like tonight was the last time I would ever see her [unfortunately]
I could have paid her Saturday.

But no.
She demanded the money.

I guess she needed the money for her fix?

That's mean...
but probably true.

Anyway, I completely flipped out on her.

I'm sick and tired of smiling all the time and pleasing other people when they treat me like garbage. I'm not a doormat; I'm a person.

It's not just Brandi.
More and more, I've noticed alot of people walk all over me.
My friends, people at work.

I'm done.
I'm taking a stand for myself.
I'm too nice; too forgiving.

That doesn't mean I'm going to turn into a cruel heartless bitch.
But I'm not going to go out of my way to help people that take advantage of me.
I know I'm supposed to treat others how I want to be treated
but I tried that, and it backfired.

I'm done bending over backwards.

--Sami